The 2-hour session was finally over, It was one of those interesting workshops where you really didn’t want to leave. The facilitator was one I could listen to all day, she deserved a 10/10 on the evaluation form. The participants were an added advantage to the forum, from all walks of life with different life perspectives, too bad time went by fast.
You could tell that the attendees needed more information from the facilitator as most queued to consult with her after the workshop. Samantha (not her real name) was ahead of me as we patiently waited to talk to the facilitator.
As soon as she got her chance to talk to the facilitator she started crying uncontrollably, “I can’t take it anymore, I feel like I am in a cage”.
She went on to talk about what she was going through as a stay-at-home mother to two beautiful children and living the American dream in a house with a white picket fence. She went to talk about how she loved her family, her volunteer work, and her life but stated that her sex life sucked.
She wanted more in the bedroom but she knew this wasn’t going to happen as her husband was not having anything to do with her “deviant” desires and he was not planning to be a “sexual deviant statistic”. I could not help but wonder, was this the place to talk about her personal matters? She talked about her desires of wearing leather boots and using a whip in her marriage, her face radiated as she talked about the “what if’s” but that look was definitely short-lived. You could tell that she was at a crossroad but didn’t know what to do. Luckily for her, the facilitator was well versed in various life topics and came to Samantha’s rescue (I assumed) by giving her some resources to help navigate her life challenges.
“When sexual personal desires clash with societal norms there is impact on one’s mental health“
On my way out I met Samantha at the door and we got to chat about the workshop and some of her challenges. It was interesting to see how her needs were having an impact on her self-esteem and self-worth. If this issue was not dealt with as soon as possible she was going to be seeking services from a mental health professional. As I walked to take the bus, I could not help but observe her slouched look. I wondered if she was anxious about the “pit” she was going back to and how she was going to bring joy into her own life. I could not help but hope that she found some answers that night through the resources she was given. I always wondered how her life turned out but as in everything else in life I just have to mind my own business and hope that she found some sort of peace and the answers she was looking for, for her own sanity.